Ask Questions to Create Thinking

Don't forget about the expert panel on ADHD at the university tonight! It is from 7:00-8:00 at the Bryant Conference Center on campus. If you'd like more information, you can find it here: http://training.ua.edu/adhd/adhd-agenda.html

We've finished our coping skills lessons in second grade, and I think the word scramble game was enjoyed by all! Today I start Safe Child lessons in first grade. If you are a first grade parent, I sent a letter home to you right after winter break with details about those lessons. If you didn't receive it or would like more information, please let me know!

And lastly, here's another blurb from the Love & Logic people. It is about helping kids become good thinkers by asking more questions and giving fewer commands. I don't know about you, but I often notice kids here at school who seem perfectly content to let me do all the talking and thinking when they have done something wrong! They know that if they just wait it out, I'll stop correcting them eventually and they will be on their merry way, just having been inconvenienced by a few minutes of babbling. They have quite a surprised look on their faces when I ask them a question, and indicate that I will wait for their response instead of just continuing to talk, no matter how long it takes them to come up with one. I don't have data on whether or not it cuts down on the wrongdoing, but I do feel good that the gears in their brains are turning and thinking is being done! (Just to be clear, I am referring here to issues like running in the hall, not serious concerns that your children need coaching or support to address. :))

At Love and Logic® we believe that kids are best prepared for the real world when we allow them to do as much thinking as possible. It's good practice for the real world, and it keeps the monkey off of our backs most of the time.

Here's the problem. Do you know kids who like to keep adults doing all of the thinking? Do you know kids who are good at tricking us into doing so?

How do we avoid falling into this trap? One strategy involves using plenty of questions!

The more questions we ask, the better thinkers our kids will become.

People who understand Love and Logic also understand that the human brain seeks closure. When we use plenty of questions, children's brains are so busy searching for closure that they have less energy left over for power-struggles.

The more questions we ask, the fewer power-struggles we will have.

Kids grow the healthiest and strongest brains when they're fortunate to spend time around adults who say things like:


"I don't know. What do you think?"


"Are you sure that's the best idea?"


"How do you think that's going to work out for you?"


"Would you like to hear what some other kids have tried?"


"Do you think that's going to work out well or ________?"


"What do you think you are going to do?"


"Which one of these is the best solution to your problem?"


"Do you have enough money to pay for any possible damage?"


"Is that a wise decision?"


Perhaps the quickest way to start giving children the gift of good thinking skills is to get into the habit of asking instead of telling.

Thanks for reading! We are glad you are here.
Sharon